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My Frustrated Fears

Packing all my sh*t in the jeep, yeah, load it up
All my demons in the back seat posted up
I'm kicking the bucket, I'm tired of showing up
Sick to my stomach, when I try but I can't throw it up
I need time just to smell the roses, I need
Self care in the heaviest doses, before my
Diagnosis of my psychosis
I'm about to blow it and nobody knows it


I picked a dot on the map, throwing it in drive
Not sure if I'm coming back, this is my goodbye
It's a shame that there is no rewind
To a time in life when I thought would be fine
Run away from the the devil that's stalking me
Nothing nice to say, but at least he talks to me
Maybe I'm insane, but speaking honestly
I either learn how to get this sh*t off of me

Or I can run, just as fast I can
To the middle of nowhere
To the middle of my frustrated fears
And I swear, you're just like a pill
Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill
You keep making me ill

The same fire that warmed me is burning me
The only thing that healed me is hurting me
The same water that floated me is soaking me
The same thing that freed me is holding me
I was hungry for love, but it's been choking me
I love attention, but it's been ignoring me
The only thing that wanted me is returning me
The only thing that saved me, deserted me


Dear God, you must be the quiet type
Unlike me, I've been screaming like dynamite
How the hell am I supposed to survive the night
When I can't even find a reason I'd want to revive my life 
I used to think that I could ask for the incredible
Now I can't swallow my pride, it ain't edible
I need some time for a reputation suicide
Took a knife straight to my hesitation, do or die

Run, just as fast I can
To the middle of nowhere
To the middle of my frustrated fears
And I swear, you're just like a pill
Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill
You keep making me ill

Run, just as fast I can
To the middle of nowhere
To the middle of my frustrated fears
And I swear, you're just like a pill
Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill
You keep making me ill

Call me selfish, call me crazy, call me cowardly
I need this time to myself, so don't follow me
Who's gonna pray for me, and who doubts me?
Who's gonna move on without me?
I guess I understand if you should get over me, cuz I
I cut ties with everyone that was close to me
But the only way to break the chains that were holding me
Is put a bullet through the brain of the man I thought I was supposed to be

Run, as fast I can
To the middle of nowhere
To the middle of my frustrated fears
And I swear, you're just like a pill
Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill

Dear God, you must be the quiet type
Unlike me, I've been screaming like dynamite
Dear God
(You keep making me ill, keep making me ill)

Or I can run, just as fast I can
To the middle of nowhere
To the middle of my frustrated fears
And I swear, you're just like a pill
Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill
You keep making me ill

Run, just as fast I can
To the middle of nowhere
To the middle of my frustrated fears
And I swear, you're just like a pill
Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill
You keep making me ill

(Please don't try so hard to say goodbye)


Kinda sick of spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

(Please don't try so hard to say goodbye)